The Chris Brown and Rihanna incident has really made me think. It amazes me how, even after Brown plead guilty, people continue to blame her. "She must have said something," people say. "She hit him first; she had it coming... She had no business destroying that boy's career." On and on the comments go. To me, it's simple: no matter what you do--no matter what you say--no woman, or anyone for that matter, deserves domestic abuse. Though this seems like common sense, it amazes how many people have sided with the abuser, the most vocal critics being women. Despite pictures of her busted lip, her bruised eye, people still manage to see Rihanna as the monster. The rogue. The traitor. Unfortunately, this mindset is common.
I vividly remember a conversation I had in high school. "No matter what black men do," a young boy said, "there's no way we can face a fair trial in America. The system is too corrupt." Most of us in the room agreed; after all, it's no secret that our justice system is filled with prejudice. If a black man and a white man commit the same crime, nine times out of ten, the black male will receive a longer sentence. The boy continued his soliloquy with a smile, eying all the young women. "That's why, if black boy rapes one of y'all, y'all can't tell. There's no way he can get a fair trial." The girls nodded in a show of psychic solidarity. Black girls don't tell became our slogan. It took days before someone had the courage to call out our stupidity.
The Chris Brown/ Rihanna incident is a microcosm of a larger problem. When will be break oppressive ties of blind solidarity? More importantly, when will we learn the value of our intrinsic worth? Why should we put our best interests aside to defend men who hurt us?
It is sad that people choose to put blame on the female. "I wonder what she did..." "I don't know, but she must've done something." I heard this numerous times. In fact, the rumor that reached my ears was that Rihanna was having an affair, caught an STD (or rather STI to be more accurate), gave it to Chris Brown, and he flipped out because of that. As if there was some sort of justification for his actions! Clearly Chris Brown is still a boy. A Man would know how to more effectively handle his emotions instead of throwing a tantrum.
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